The White Yuppie Question

I am a White refugee. I moved to a rural community to get away from brown immigrants, who moved in and changed the culture (and vastly increased the crime rate and doubled the population) of my area. Now I am in the position of contemplating yet another move within five years. Why? White yuppies are invading.... 

 The other day I went to the store, and it was unusually crowded. I met a woman who said she was moving here from the Bay Area to get away from the crime. I welcomed her and began to tell her about the nice life we have here. She had a little boy with her. She asked if there were gangs and I said no. She asked about drugs and I explained that druggies live both in the city and the country, but here everyone knows who they are and to stay away from them. She asked about violent crime and I said there was virtually none. I said everyone has at least two guns. I was relaxed at that point, until her eyes popped out of her head. Hysterically, and very quickly, she said, "WHY WOULD ANYONE NEED A GUN IF THERE'S NO CRIME?" I was taken aback and said, "There's no crime because people know everyone has guns and there are many ranchers up here and situations do arise." She rudely snapped, "What kind of situations?" I said, "Sometimes you have to shoot your animals if they are critically injured, or a deer hit by a car whose still alive because the vet is a hour away." She asked, "Will the ranchers shoot me if I accidentally step on their property?" I said, "NO!" She continued, "Do you have a gun?" I said, "Yes." She shot back, "Why do you need a gun?" I said I enjoy target shooting and I need home protection." She continued grilling me, and I noticed her son getting very excited. He said, with total fascination "What kind of gun do you have, a rifle?" I said yes, and he said "COOL!" His mother was almost in hysterics at this time and said, "Why do you need home protection when you can just call the police?" I explained that there is only one sheriff on duty in this county, and if someone comes into my home, it is his life or mine. She seemed shocked that I would say this so casually. OH! The gun culture! Yes, ma'am, gun crime must be rampant here because we're all a bunch of militia freaks plotting the takeover of the world. I wonder why she's moving here in the first place?

 What was interesting to me was her adament anti-gun attitude coupled with her son's fascination with guns. He is the very type of child who will find a gun and have an accident, or shoot up a school because he has no father and an intolerant, judgmental mother. His mother's hysteria only makes the gun more appealing, and she will never teach him about gun safety. He will grow up feminized and have no male guidance. In other words, the profile of a potential criminal. So now I will be living in a town with an "at risk" child, and if he shoots someone, we'll get to hear about how violent country people are. Yeah, the small-town culture must have overtaken the schools. The mother very likely does not understand her role in this because she is a sanctimonious liberal bitch who represents the culture-destroying cancer that is invading rural America because of the White flight caused by the public policies promulgated by liberals who took a few too many hits of acid during the '60s.

 I can already see the crisis-stricken life this White liberal yuppie will live here. I wish I had the money to install a video camera and capture the horror on her face when she sees her first rattlesnake slithering under her house. People like her call 911 when they see snakes. Up here, we don't depend on the government to take care of routine problems that can be solved with a .22 loaded with shotshell.

 I'll deviate from this story a little now and tell you why the police don't like city people. Each time I get an opportunity, I question the sheriffs about the calls made by these city slickers. One woman called 911 a few years ago after she spotted a harmless tarantula in the road. I was nearly in tears listening to this officer tell me he had to explain that the harmless critters crawl until they find mates before it gets cold. Many frightened city people call and say, "I HEARD GUNSHOTS!" The sheriff tries to explain to these unassimilable, ignorant city fools that everyone has guns up here in the wilderness, and there are rarely, if ever, shootings involving human victims. But the sheriff has to respond to the call, and interrupt people during target practice to tell them the hysterical White woman from San Francisco is upset they are exercising their 2nd Amendment right on their own property.

 My favorite city slicker story involves a woman I met once who follwed her contractor husband up here from San Jose. She was on every prescription drug in the book, and had the nerve to ask me if I could tell her where she could buy some methamphetamine. Of course, I told her I wouldn't know of any such person, and I was offended she asked me in the first place because I do not have the look of a cranker. I also felt it was very inapproprate, especially since she had a four-year-old daughter. But I did take the opportunity to do what has traditionally been done by the old timers to scare these people into leaving. I knew she had severe allergies and suffered from slight paranoia. I started telling her tarantula and scorpion stories.

 Her eyes got all wild as I explained she'd have to spend $60 a month for an exterminator to kill the scorpions and assassin bugs that will creep into her house. She asked what an assassin bug is and I explained that with each bite, a person becomes more allergic and that my Avon lady had to go to the emergency room after the second bite. Highly allergic people should move was the moral of the story. Then I hit her with the story of the tarantula I found walking down my hall. That wasn't enough though. I told her about the rattlesnakes and their habit of hanging out in gardens during the summer. She said that was no problem, her yard had been landscaped to avoid this. So I walked around her yard and explained that her yard had such high, thick brush that it was an open invitation for mountain lions and rattlers. She explained how much she loved birds, and that she didn't want their nests disturbed. Then I explained that assassin bugs hang out in bird nests.

 Then she shared her own horror story. She was driving to the day care to pick up her daughter and a BOBCAT WAS WALKING ACROSS THE ROAD, IN PLAIN SIGHT! I had to literally turn my head away so she wouldn't see me laughing. She had to be told that in the wilderness you will see bobcats. Though they are benevolent, I made up a story about a hiker who had been charged by one.

 I never saw her again, I think they moved.

 These women I described epitomize the mentality of the people who are invading my adopted homeland. They are cultural maggots rotting away the very few places left in this country that resemble the America we used to have before gangs, school shootings by boys put on anti-depressants, massive drug addiction and black mobs burning down cities and attacking White people at random. I assimilated into the culture here and I appreciate the wildlife and the peace of the community. Yuppies don't. They try to re-create their wasteland in the city with their air-polluting SUV's and phony "tolerant" mentalities.

 Do you recall the woman I described in my opening paragraphs? She asked me if ranchers shoot people who step on their property not because it was a valid question, but because she was expressing her contempt for this community and the people who live in it. BEFORE she has lived here and gotten to know the people. She is "prejudiced," ignorant, intolerant and hostile, but believes she is enlightened and empowered. She won't feel so empowered after she moves up here and has to ask a "redneck" for help after she gets her car stuck in the mud. She will be utterly helpless when the power goes off when it is 110 degrees outside. Hmm... Guess who will have the generator? Yeah, the guy she called the cops on for shooting her unfenced dogs after they attacked his livestock.

 She will preach cultural diversity while doing her best to destroy mine. I wanted to give her a piece of my mind in that store, and I probably will the next time I see her. Here I was, being hospitable and preparing to invite her and her son to go fishing in my special spot, and she immediately looks for an excuse to make her hatred for rural people known. She was literally trying to pick a fight in a crowded store with a total stranger who was being friendly. I was so shocked I didn't respond in the way I normally would to liberal bullies. I was calm and didn't say, "I HAVE A GUN, YOU SANCTIMONIOUS LIBERAL BITCH, BECAUSE IT IS MY GOD-GIVEN RIGHT AND YOU NEED TO MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS." Business like her kid who is so fascinated with guns for some odd reason. She may be surprised the next time she pulls this act, because she was overheard by many locals, and within a week, everyone will know about her. The old-timers know that people like her are the ones who move in and demand the local rodeo be cancelled because it doesn't meet their "community standards." They want fresh air to breathe when they roll the windows of their polluting SUVs, and horseshit stinks. Yep, it does. So do forest fires, but that doesn't stop these people from organizing to prevent controlled burning, for fear the burns will get out of control. Then they don't understand why they get burned out of their luxury homes within the next decade and blame the forest service, who they prevented from thinning the brush in the first place. They have no remorse for causing others to lose their homes because of their ecological ignorance.

 Problem yuppies...

 Have you ever wondered about the IQ of people who place salt licks on their lawns to attract deer and then complain about mountain lions? They look at you with awe when you say, "Mountain lions eat deer, REMOVE THE SALT LICK and the problem will disappear." The result, a dead mountain lion. These same city yuppies are the only ones you hear about being attacked by wild animals. I don't mean to defame victims, but sometimes they do in fact bring it on themselves. I am a social Darwinist and I will not apologize for that. I believe the proliferation of idiots is bad for society. The people who get attacked by large cats when they are jogging on trails in the dark surrounded by high brush with music blaring in their ears are the idiots I speak of. The Departement of Fish and Game will come out and relocate a "problem lion," but there is no department to relocate "problem yuppies." The vast majority of adult people who fall victim to the occasional animal attack can be placed in the "city slicker" category. True country people do not get hooved to death while feeding deer because they know it is plain idiotic to do such a thing. They don't feed bears, because they know real bears aren't like the cuddly teddy bears they grew up with. They don't feed rabid squirrels by hand and they don't drive their cars off of cliffs to avoid running over a squirrel. City people do, and they make 90% of the 911 calls around here. Our tax dollars are used to save these dangerously stupid people.

 Hypocrites...

 City environmentalists work overtime to prevent rural farmers from using their own land because of an endangered rodent they themselves would kill in a hot second if it entered their property. The same people who use 10 times the gas as me or you want to "save the environment" and promote road building in wilderness so they can get their gas-guzzling SUV's down the trail. Yup, the same people who destroy wildlife habitat to build their "second home in the hills" are very concerned about the endangered rodents on someone else's land. They invade your communities and promote "smart growth" and bringing business into the area, which will turn your community into a sewer within two decades. They complain about your having two children in the name of population control, but their mouths are glued shut while a million plus breeders stream across the border every year. Oh no, it's not numbers, it's consumption, say the super-consumers. Then they complain that the immigrants can't afford SUVs.

 Just about all of the city people I described in this "hate rant" are the very ones who regularly use derogatory language and racial and class slurs to describe true country folk. They hate us, and it is time we start hating them back and stop selling land to them and accepting them with open arms. It's time to stop risking your lives to help the nice anti-gun liberal get rid of a rattlesnake in her garden. It is time to refuse to plug up the mice holes in the home of the local pro-busing activist. It's time to just pass them on by when they are broken down on the side of the road. It's time to just let these people fall on their faces so they will conclude that yuppies are not tough enough to live in the country.

 When I first moved here, a White yuppie (with an SUV in her parking lot) complained to me that her neighbor did not aid her in getting rid of a large, menacing-looking bull who was hanging out on her property. She said he made a joke that was not funny. The joke? He said to place a rope around the bull's neck and lead him off the property. I realize now that the man may not have been joking. He had "battered redneck syndrome." The lady has since moved.

 Individually, these yuppies may be nice, but as soon as they become a majority, their true nature comes out. We must look at them as we look at any invading force. They seek not to assimilate as I did, they seek to take your land, your constitutional rights and your very cultural base. Instinctively, they will re-create their homelands in the city the way immigrants from third-world countries do.

 Make no mistake people. These folks smile nice, but their lips cover the fangs deep within their gums. If we ever have to barricade our communities from black rioting the way Cincinnati residents have, these people should be used in the buffer zone.

 ANGRY WHITE FEMALE